Contest results
Thou shall ............
Commandment I
Thou shall look attentive and eager as the news of the casinos ever changing policies and procedures goes in one ear and out the other!
Commandment II
Thou shall not engage in conversation with a blackjack dealer that is not a prelude to sex!
Commandment III
Thou shall to remember that duel rate who rode your ass on his game that the past 3 rolls were a 6 ,9 and 4 when he is dealing on your game!!!
Commandment IV
Thou shall always sing like Sinatra when "the boys are in the game".
Commandment V
Thou shall deal according to policies and procedures...until the shift boss leaves the pit.
Commandment VI
Thou shall ALWAYS return from break with thy sports scores!
Commandment VII
Thou shall honor all of thy crew by doing what we do when she wants to throw the dice that makes our job so nice (SS)
Commandment VIII
Thou shall have sex with as many cocktail servers as possible and keep thy running score
Commandment VIIII
Thou shall NEVER take this business so serious that it gives you gray hair or ulcers.
Commandment X
Thou shall accept the fact that that your boxperson , aka "GOD" comes in all shapes and sizes and GOD's rules and moods are subject to change without notice and thou shall just fuckin'deal with it!
Contest results
Thou shall ............
Commandment I
Thou shall look attentive and eager as the news of the casinos ever changing policies and procedures goes in one ear and out the other!
Commandment II
Thou shall not engage in conversation with a blackjack dealer that is not a prelude to sex!
Commandment III
Thou shall to remember that duel rate who rode your ass on his game that the past 3 rolls were a 6 ,9 and 4 when he is dealing on your game!!!
Commandment IV
Thou shall always sing like Sinatra when "the boys are in the game".
Commandment V
Thou shall deal according to policies and procedures...until the shift boss leaves the pit.
Commandment VI
Thou shall ALWAYS return from break with thy sports scores!
Commandment VII
Thou shall honor all of thy crew by doing what we do when she wants to throw the dice that makes our job so nice (SS)
Commandment VIII
Thou shall have sex with as many cocktail servers as possible and keep thy running score
Commandment VIIII
Thou shall NEVER take this business so serious that it gives you gray hair or ulcers.
Commandment X
Thou shall accept the fact that that your boxperson , aka "GOD" comes in all shapes and sizes and GOD's rules and moods are subject to change without notice and thou shall just fuckin'deal with it!
Thou Honorable Mention....
Thou shall announce "Crap Game" when a nice looking lady walks by.
Thou shall not announce false "crap games".
Thou shall soft hustle.
Thou shall ask the player if he wants a beer with that shot he just took at you.
Thou shall not accept late bets from strokers.
Thou shall honor all thy Georges
Thou shall honor all of thy crew by doing what we do when she wants to throw the dice that makes our job so nice (SS)
Thou shall use creative stick calls and keep them fresh.Thou shall come up from break on time
Thou shall always reserve the couch in the dealers lounge FOR CRAPS DEALERS ONLY!!!!
Thou shall uphold tradition by always busting the balls of a break in dealer.
Thou shall always respect and admire the blackjack dealers (THAT SUPPORT YOUR ASS!)
Thou shall play dumb and deny everything.
Thou shall always sing like Sinatra when "the boys are in the game".
Thou shall ALWAYS return from break with thy sports scores!
Thou shall always assume the POW position on a dead game.
Thou shall look attentive and eager as the news of the casinos ever changing policies and procedures goes in one ear and out the other!
Thou shall LEARN HOW TO SPEAK @#$%@&# ENGLISH when dealing on the stick!!!!!
Thou shall always remember that the Boxperson is your GOD and that Floor supervisors are "GODS BOSS!"
Thou shall always shut thy @#$%@& mouth and deal thy @#$%@& game!
Thou shall book all bets!
Thou shall Beat the living hell out of any stick-person who thinks what we do when she wants to throw the dice that makes our job so nice is sexist!
Thou shall cover thy ass at all times while on the game.
Thou shall send in any and all bonehead moves by craps dealers for "tales from the dice pit"
Thou shall NOT deal like an elephant by pounding on the table when paying your place bets.
Thou shall keep a straight face when the new kid is asked to get the puck polish during his next break.
Thou shall never convert and total the don'ts "just to see if surveillance in watching."
Thou shall listen and learn when an old school supervisor takes the time to tell you how it really was in Vegas before it became a commercialized, let's bring the kids for vacation, and let's hit all of the fun roller coasters type of town.
30. Thou shall have sex with as many cocktail servers as possible and keep thy running score
31. Thou shall never call a "seven out!" on a "winner seven!"
32. Thou shall NEVER take this business so serious that it gives you gray hair or ulcers.
33. Thou shall advise to those seeking thy advise NOT to get into the "today's" casino business
34. Thou shall never let fleas infest your game.
35. Thou shall respect the suit if not the person
36. Thou shall respect thy years of experience if not the person
37. Thou shall never forget thou were once a break-in whilst thou "breaketh the balls of the thy"
38. Thou shall NEVER forget that the King George might be the guy you didn't let get to the game
39. Thou shall only be concerned with thy actions and not what everyone does
40. Thou shall ALWAYS run over thy who TRY to run over you.
41. Thou shall always try to excel in dealing dice, never becoming a LUMP!
42. Thou shall always alert the box when any hotties are in view!
43. Thou shall never "pick the line " after "firing one up"!!
44. Thou shall not fall asleep again while sitting box! Thou shall not fall asleep again while sitting box! Thy must remember Thou shall not fall asleep again while sitting box!
45. Thou shall NOT hand off come bets to someone not toking you
46. Thou shall always ask for thy early out.
47. Thou shall remain patient during that long eight, cause it only takes one King George to stop by to make that toke box look oh so great!
48. Thou shall not run George out of the color he is toking me!!!!!!
49. Thou shall with loud and clear voice thank the flea that walked and forgot their "last come" bet, whilst handing it to the box as a hand-in.
50. Thou shall always remember to teach the new guy what to do when she wants to shoot the dice that makes our job so nice.....even if the new guy is a girl!
51. Thou shall try to give the dealer whose Friday it is .... the pole!
52. Thou shall except the fact that the male craps dealer and supervisor is a sexist pig!
53. Thou shall always hog the eo spot when working with lumps
54. Thou shall never question god (the boxman)
55. Thou shall never release gas in the dice pit
56. Thou shall always forget the payouts when a lump is sitting box !
57. Thou shall NEVER allow your wife to work in the same casino
58. Thou shall always maintain an ace in the hole (another career)
59. Thou shall do into other dealers as they do into you
60. Thou shall always remember "what goes around, comes around"
61. Thou shall be an actor at work of "Shakespearean proportions."
62. Thou shall mind thy own business, come to work and deal thy game at the best of thy ability and don't get thyself involved in internal political bullshit
63. Thou shall always remember when dealing craps to K.I.S.S.
64. Thou shall never trust anybody in the casino business including players and never assume they can be trusted.
65. Thou shall never rely on someone else too "take care of you"
66. Thou shall sit here like an idiot and stare at thy monitor for an hour and not think of one commandment to send in!
67.THOU SHALL TELL THE PLAYER THAT IF HE DON'T HIT THE BACK WALL, WE ARE GOING TO FINE HIM $5.00 (AND USE THAT FOR THE DEALERS TOKES)
68.THOU SHALL ASK THE PLAYER WHO HAS TOSSED A $5.00 CHIP FOR CRAP ELEVEN........"THANK YOU SIR, HOW ABOUT YOURSELF???
69.THOU SHALL TRY TO KNOCK THE WIG OFF WITH THE STICK .....OF THE PLAYER STANDING NEXT TO YOU.
70.THOU SHALL NOT ASK IF IT'S TIME TO GO HOME AT THE BEGINNING OF A SHIFT.
71.THOU SHALL HOLD UP FIVE FINGERS TO THE PLAYER AND CONFIRM HE WANTED A $1000.00 MARKER.
72. THOU SHALL HOLD UP ONE FINGER TO THE PLAYER ,AND CONFIRM HE WANTED A $500.00 MARKER
73.THOU SHALL ASK BREAK-IN PLAYERS FOR A $5.00 MYSTERY BET AND THEN PLACE IT ON ALL THE HARDWAYS AND A YO........FOR THE DEALERS.
74.When auditioning for a dice dealing job, thou shall respect all past and present dealers by taking pride in their appearance by ironing thy shirt, knowing thy payouts, and having thy hands in shape to deal a clean, smooth, and professional game.
75. Thou shall come to work "hungover" as often as needed but no less than once a week.
76. Thou shall deal according to policies and procedures...until the shift boss leaves the pit.77. Thou shall always remember the incantation of resurrection, "TWO WAY"
78. Thou shall not give $20 dice lessons.
79. Thou shall not ask the "flamer" standing next to the base if he wants to "shoot"!
80.Thou shall not engage in conversation with a blackjack dealer that is not a prelude to sex!
81. Thou shall not start any conversation on the game with a " bulldyke " for they are the spawn of Satan sent here to ruin our pristine playground.
82. Thou shall tell the idiot floorperson, who lied about knowing dice in order to get promoted to pit, " I have to go to the restroom ....RIGHT NOW! "
83. Thou shall accept the fact that Pit Managers got their jobs for who they blew not what they knew!
84. Thou shall not ever call a skank to the game just for fun!
85. Thou shall understand that above all else, pussy is the reason we all put up with this bullshit!
86. THOU SHALL """DUMP THE BOWL""" (BEFORE THE FLEA HAS THE CHANCE TO SAY "SAME DICE")
87. Thou Shall NOT choose, just drop it in the box!
88. THOU SHALL ALWAYS TELL THE PLAYERS, TO PLEASE STAND BEHIND THE WHITE LINE IF THEY ARE NOT PLAYING.
89.Thou shall to remember that duel rate who rode your ass on his game that the past 3 rolls were a 6 ,9 and 4 when he is dealing on your game!!
90. THOU SHALL MARK THE POINT AND NOT WHATEVER YOU FEEL LIKE MARKING.
91. THOU SHALL ALWAYS REMEMBER TO "FORGET" TO PICK UP THE DON'T COME BET FIRST ON A SEVEN OUT, CAUSE EVERYONE MIGHT THINK YOU KNOW HOW TO DEAL BY PROCEDURE.
92. THOU SHALL ALWAYS REMEMBER TO HAVE A MOMENT OF SILENCE WHEN THE DEALERS HARDWAYS FALL
93. Thou shall accept the fact that that your boxperson , aka "GOD" comes in all shapes and sizes and GOD's rules and moods are subject to change without notice and thou shall just fuckin'deal with it!
94. Thou shall teach new players how to bet for the dealers
95. Thou shall NEVER bear false witness to a dealer YO!
96. Thou shall always buy thy instructor a bottle of JW at the conclusion of the craps training lessons.
97. Thou shall when on the day ships during Spring Break, practice your English accent just in case the totty comes by.
98. Thou Shall Always Let Her Cock your Dice, ..but Never Let Her Dice Your .........!!!!!!
99. Thou shall politely tell the hotties there are no odds on the dealers when she nails one with the dice.
100. Thou shall always get the change wrong for the guy who keeps wanting to take his 6&8 from $72 each to $102 each
101. Thou shall always call two craps "the ace holes" no matter who is standing in the pit!!
102. Thou shalt laugh at my bad jokes.
-Yea, though I farteth, thou shalt remain as a pillar of salt.
103. Thou shall sell prop bets in a thick country hick accent, while calling rolls in a thick Asian accent!!!!
104. Thou shall not hop thy own hardway!!!
105. Thou shall not say "Coming out from the dark side" when a big black guy is going to be the shooter playing on the dont pass line! (I sure learned my lesson)
Thou shall announce "Crap Game" when a nice looking lady walks by.
Thou shall not announce false "crap games".
Thou shall soft hustle.
Thou shall ask the player if he wants a beer with that shot he just took at you.
Thou shall not accept late bets from strokers.
Thou shall honor all thy Georges
Thou shall honor all of thy crew by doing what we do when she wants to throw the dice that makes our job so nice (SS)
Thou shall use creative stick calls and keep them fresh.Thou shall come up from break on time
Thou shall always reserve the couch in the dealers lounge FOR CRAPS DEALERS ONLY!!!!
Thou shall uphold tradition by always busting the balls of a break in dealer.
Thou shall always respect and admire the blackjack dealers (THAT SUPPORT YOUR ASS!)
Thou shall play dumb and deny everything.
Thou shall always sing like Sinatra when "the boys are in the game".
Thou shall ALWAYS return from break with thy sports scores!
Thou shall always assume the POW position on a dead game.
Thou shall look attentive and eager as the news of the casinos ever changing policies and procedures goes in one ear and out the other!
Thou shall LEARN HOW TO SPEAK @#$%@&# ENGLISH when dealing on the stick!!!!!
Thou shall always remember that the Boxperson is your GOD and that Floor supervisors are "GODS BOSS!"
Thou shall always shut thy @#$%@& mouth and deal thy @#$%@& game!
Thou shall book all bets!
Thou shall Beat the living hell out of any stick-person who thinks what we do when she wants to throw the dice that makes our job so nice is sexist!
Thou shall cover thy ass at all times while on the game.
Thou shall send in any and all bonehead moves by craps dealers for "tales from the dice pit"
Thou shall NOT deal like an elephant by pounding on the table when paying your place bets.
Thou shall keep a straight face when the new kid is asked to get the puck polish during his next break.
Thou shall never convert and total the don'ts "just to see if surveillance in watching."
Thou shall listen and learn when an old school supervisor takes the time to tell you how it really was in Vegas before it became a commercialized, let's bring the kids for vacation, and let's hit all of the fun roller coasters type of town.
30. Thou shall have sex with as many cocktail servers as possible and keep thy running score
31. Thou shall never call a "seven out!" on a "winner seven!"
32. Thou shall NEVER take this business so serious that it gives you gray hair or ulcers.
33. Thou shall advise to those seeking thy advise NOT to get into the "today's" casino business
34. Thou shall never let fleas infest your game.
35. Thou shall respect the suit if not the person
36. Thou shall respect thy years of experience if not the person
37. Thou shall never forget thou were once a break-in whilst thou "breaketh the balls of the thy"
38. Thou shall NEVER forget that the King George might be the guy you didn't let get to the game
39. Thou shall only be concerned with thy actions and not what everyone does
40. Thou shall ALWAYS run over thy who TRY to run over you.
41. Thou shall always try to excel in dealing dice, never becoming a LUMP!
42. Thou shall always alert the box when any hotties are in view!
43. Thou shall never "pick the line " after "firing one up"!!
44. Thou shall not fall asleep again while sitting box! Thou shall not fall asleep again while sitting box! Thy must remember Thou shall not fall asleep again while sitting box!
45. Thou shall NOT hand off come bets to someone not toking you
46. Thou shall always ask for thy early out.
47. Thou shall remain patient during that long eight, cause it only takes one King George to stop by to make that toke box look oh so great!
48. Thou shall not run George out of the color he is toking me!!!!!!
49. Thou shall with loud and clear voice thank the flea that walked and forgot their "last come" bet, whilst handing it to the box as a hand-in.
50. Thou shall always remember to teach the new guy what to do when she wants to shoot the dice that makes our job so nice.....even if the new guy is a girl!
51. Thou shall try to give the dealer whose Friday it is .... the pole!
52. Thou shall except the fact that the male craps dealer and supervisor is a sexist pig!
53. Thou shall always hog the eo spot when working with lumps
54. Thou shall never question god (the boxman)
55. Thou shall never release gas in the dice pit
56. Thou shall always forget the payouts when a lump is sitting box !
57. Thou shall NEVER allow your wife to work in the same casino
58. Thou shall always maintain an ace in the hole (another career)
59. Thou shall do into other dealers as they do into you
60. Thou shall always remember "what goes around, comes around"
61. Thou shall be an actor at work of "Shakespearean proportions."
62. Thou shall mind thy own business, come to work and deal thy game at the best of thy ability and don't get thyself involved in internal political bullshit
63. Thou shall always remember when dealing craps to K.I.S.S.
64. Thou shall never trust anybody in the casino business including players and never assume they can be trusted.
65. Thou shall never rely on someone else too "take care of you"
66. Thou shall sit here like an idiot and stare at thy monitor for an hour and not think of one commandment to send in!
67.THOU SHALL TELL THE PLAYER THAT IF HE DON'T HIT THE BACK WALL, WE ARE GOING TO FINE HIM $5.00 (AND USE THAT FOR THE DEALERS TOKES)
68.THOU SHALL ASK THE PLAYER WHO HAS TOSSED A $5.00 CHIP FOR CRAP ELEVEN........"THANK YOU SIR, HOW ABOUT YOURSELF???
69.THOU SHALL TRY TO KNOCK THE WIG OFF WITH THE STICK .....OF THE PLAYER STANDING NEXT TO YOU.
70.THOU SHALL NOT ASK IF IT'S TIME TO GO HOME AT THE BEGINNING OF A SHIFT.
71.THOU SHALL HOLD UP FIVE FINGERS TO THE PLAYER AND CONFIRM HE WANTED A $1000.00 MARKER.
72. THOU SHALL HOLD UP ONE FINGER TO THE PLAYER ,AND CONFIRM HE WANTED A $500.00 MARKER
73.THOU SHALL ASK BREAK-IN PLAYERS FOR A $5.00 MYSTERY BET AND THEN PLACE IT ON ALL THE HARDWAYS AND A YO........FOR THE DEALERS.
74.When auditioning for a dice dealing job, thou shall respect all past and present dealers by taking pride in their appearance by ironing thy shirt, knowing thy payouts, and having thy hands in shape to deal a clean, smooth, and professional game.
75. Thou shall come to work "hungover" as often as needed but no less than once a week.
76. Thou shall deal according to policies and procedures...until the shift boss leaves the pit.77. Thou shall always remember the incantation of resurrection, "TWO WAY"
78. Thou shall not give $20 dice lessons.
79. Thou shall not ask the "flamer" standing next to the base if he wants to "shoot"!
80.Thou shall not engage in conversation with a blackjack dealer that is not a prelude to sex!
81. Thou shall not start any conversation on the game with a " bulldyke " for they are the spawn of Satan sent here to ruin our pristine playground.
82. Thou shall tell the idiot floorperson, who lied about knowing dice in order to get promoted to pit, " I have to go to the restroom ....RIGHT NOW! "
83. Thou shall accept the fact that Pit Managers got their jobs for who they blew not what they knew!
84. Thou shall not ever call a skank to the game just for fun!
85. Thou shall understand that above all else, pussy is the reason we all put up with this bullshit!
86. THOU SHALL """DUMP THE BOWL""" (BEFORE THE FLEA HAS THE CHANCE TO SAY "SAME DICE")
87. Thou Shall NOT choose, just drop it in the box!
88. THOU SHALL ALWAYS TELL THE PLAYERS, TO PLEASE STAND BEHIND THE WHITE LINE IF THEY ARE NOT PLAYING.
89.Thou shall to remember that duel rate who rode your ass on his game that the past 3 rolls were a 6 ,9 and 4 when he is dealing on your game!!
90. THOU SHALL MARK THE POINT AND NOT WHATEVER YOU FEEL LIKE MARKING.
91. THOU SHALL ALWAYS REMEMBER TO "FORGET" TO PICK UP THE DON'T COME BET FIRST ON A SEVEN OUT, CAUSE EVERYONE MIGHT THINK YOU KNOW HOW TO DEAL BY PROCEDURE.
92. THOU SHALL ALWAYS REMEMBER TO HAVE A MOMENT OF SILENCE WHEN THE DEALERS HARDWAYS FALL
93. Thou shall accept the fact that that your boxperson , aka "GOD" comes in all shapes and sizes and GOD's rules and moods are subject to change without notice and thou shall just fuckin'deal with it!
94. Thou shall teach new players how to bet for the dealers
95. Thou shall NEVER bear false witness to a dealer YO!
96. Thou shall always buy thy instructor a bottle of JW at the conclusion of the craps training lessons.
97. Thou shall when on the day ships during Spring Break, practice your English accent just in case the totty comes by.
98. Thou Shall Always Let Her Cock your Dice, ..but Never Let Her Dice Your .........!!!!!!
99. Thou shall politely tell the hotties there are no odds on the dealers when she nails one with the dice.
100. Thou shall always get the change wrong for the guy who keeps wanting to take his 6&8 from $72 each to $102 each
101. Thou shall always call two craps "the ace holes" no matter who is standing in the pit!!
102. Thou shalt laugh at my bad jokes.
-Yea, though I farteth, thou shalt remain as a pillar of salt.
103. Thou shall sell prop bets in a thick country hick accent, while calling rolls in a thick Asian accent!!!!
104. Thou shall not hop thy own hardway!!!
105. Thou shall not say "Coming out from the dark side" when a big black guy is going to be the shooter playing on the dont pass line! (I sure learned my lesson)
